Archive for the ‘Trade names’ Category

50 shades of green

May 6, 2018

(from the annals of remarkable company names and the Index Paranomasiarum)

For Naked Gardening Day (today and every May 6th), this shot of a landscaping company in the Miami area:

If Christian Gray is out on call, Marquis De Sod will discipline you — work you over in raunchy verdure under the fierce Florida sun. They will bind you, edge you, train you, hold you back until tomorrow, when they will allow you the release of Masturbation Day.

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On the track of men’s deodorant

May 6, 2018

Trying to recover the name of a deodorant I’d once used, I went on a Google search and immediately pulled up the Balding Beards site — they offer to put you on a mailing list for manly products — with its piece “The Top 10 Best Deodorants and Antiperspirants for Men” by Domen Hrovatin on 4/13/18. Three of the choices — all new to me — have memorable names: Primal Pit Paste Natural Deodorant (/p/-alliteration, and of course, rough, hairy, manly pits — women have underarms, men have armpits, or just pits); Forest by Herban Cowboy (major pun groan, at least for AmE speakers, for whom urban and herban are homophonous; plus those stone-butch cowboys and the masculine scent of the woods); and Jack Black Pit Boss (rhyming Jack Black, all tough monosyllables, plus the image of a tough casino pit boss, and, once again, pit).

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Another portmanrito

April 28, 2018

Into a world that already has the Whopperrito, the Sushirrito, and the turkerito there now bursts the Protein Bar-rito (from the Protein Bar & Kitchen). Where will this end?

Photo on the hoof by Mike Pope, from the Protein Bar location at 151 N. Michigan Ave. in Chicago:

(#1) Protein Bar + burrito

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Another quick cartoon comprehension quiz

April 27, 2018

Paul Noth in the April 30th New Yorker:

(#1) “Et tu, Little Caesar?”

Two contributing factors that intersect in the name Caesar.

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Tomato mayonnaise

April 13, 2018

The idea of creating a sauce or dressing by blending mayonnaise with a smooth tomato preparation (tomato paste, tomato purée, or tomato ketchup) has occurred to cooks again and again over the years. To this tomato mayo base they have added any number of other ingredients: horseradish, mustard, vinegar, lemon juice (or lime juice or orange juice), cream, sour cream, pim(i)entos, chopped sweet peppers, red pepper flakes, tomato pieces, chopped pickles, chopped green olives, chopped ripe olives, chopped nuts (walnuts or others), chopped hard-boiled egg, chives, chopped onion, garlic, Worchestershire sauce, Tabasco sauce (or other hot sauce), barbecue sauce, herbs (for instance, parsley, dill, oregano, tarragon, or cilantro), and spices (for instance, black pepper, cayenne, paprika, cumin, or turmeric).

The Heinz company has now entered this culinary arena with a proposal for yet another basic tomato mayo sauce. From the WaPo today “Heinz promotes its new ‘mayochup’ and sparks an international controversy” by Samantha Schmidt, beginning:

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I wandered lonely as a pork cloud

March 15, 2018

Yes, pork cloud. What the Bacon’s Heir company has re-named their version of chicharrones, aka (fried) pork rinds, which they believe are so fluffy that they have to be thought of as pork puffs:

We take fresh pork skin, melt off the fat, cure the skin in salt, and rapidly puff it in olive oil [so: pork skin puffs]. The result is so outrageously fluffy we had to change the name.

To my ear, the name is risible, very close to oxymoronic.

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lubricity

March 8, 2018

(Shirtless guy, sexual slang, lots of sexlube, suggestive naming, but nothing truly hard-core.)

Yesterday’s Daily Jocks ad, for Amity Jack products:

(#1) Model in jock strap applying BANG Oil from Amity Jack

Trade names Jack and BANG, both chosen to suggest uses for the company’s main products, sexlubes for gay men: to jack oneself or another guy off, to bang a guy.

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