Too much for me to cope with, or even fully describe, and for reasons that will quickly become clear, I have get on with household tasks very soon now, so this has to be abbreviated.
Today is Thursday, the now-standard day for stripping the bed, washing the bedclothes, and putting on fresh sheets. I do the first part of this, slowly but efficiently. My helper J does the new sheets part, because that’s difficult, painful, and tiring for me — tends to take nearly an hour, because I have to stop and pant and rest every so often. It takes J a few minutes, and he then goes on to a big set of household tasks (while I do another load of laundry, for my clothes.)
J did not appear. After he was half an hour late, I mailed my care agency; they eventually said that the agency subcontracting J had moved him to another project, and he wouldn’t ever be back. One of the managers would come to see me at 12:30.
Terrible blow; J did many useful things for me (and we had some future projects I’d bought materials for), not the least of which was being an actual live person, smart and resourceful and good company, someone to talk with when I get a social visit from non-helper friends every two months at best.
I was dithering about how I would even get through the day when I checked the balance in my credit union account and discovered that the Social Security people had deposited a gigantic one-time windfall (it’s complicated, but the money’s entirely genuine; I learned about these payments from Barbara Partee a while back and realized one would come to me eventually, and there it was). So I could order a couple of meals without counting the pennies.
The 12:30 meeting was a push to start getting me ready to sell this house and move to a residential community. Endless complexities, with lots of reassurance that I could just reproduce my workspace in such a community. I had to keep reminding people that I worked full-time on a professional career, and needed the resources to do that, and someone to take over a lot of daily things so that I could do my job. I foresee lots of promises that all of this would be easily taken care of, followed by the refrain “Oh, we couldn’t do that!” and the like.
Meanwhile, I have an enormous amount of stuff to get rid of. Including most of the stuff that makes this little condo an art show and eccentric museum. My caregiving agency is looking for someone new to give me a hand with daily life and to help with the transition to a new place.
But now I have to make up the bed, water the garden, take out the trash, and much much more.