The star boxboy

Today, December 13th, is Day 1 of the 12 Days of Commercial Christmas (Day 1 of the 12 Days of Christian Christmas is, of course, Christmas Day, December 25th). (Meanwhile, December 13th on the Christian religious calendar is St. Lucy’s Day, on which unwary Scandinavian girls set their hair on fire, as a precursor to the coming of the light of Christ on Christmas Day. Yes, people have told me that my religious education is somewhat spotty.)

In any case, the Daily Jocks people are recognizing the days of Commercial Christmas with what looks like a Man Meat of the Day for each of the 12 days, beginning with the, um, boxboy I called Joey when he turned up last year as the DJ offering for Boxing Day.

Now promoted to the inaugural position in the season of commercial excess, Joey appears again in his Santa hat, red party socks, and blindingly new basketball shoes (underwear models and gay porn stars nearly always appear in brand-new athletic shoes — or spiffy boots — whatever else they fail to be be wearing). Joey is quite free about displaying and offering his delicious body, so that some of what follows is not for the sexually naive or the sexually modest.

From my 12/25/20 posting “The Boxing Day special”

A wonderfully lubricious Daily Jocks sale ad for Boxing Day, the day after Christmas, taking advantage of allusions to box in several different sexual senses:

(#1) Muscular glutes and a broad, somewhat goofy, smile. On a Christmas theme, without any actual underwear — just red DJX Football Socks (which are advertised as partywear).

Last year this long-legged beauty came with some thoroughly raunchy free verse (The boxboy at play) about him, beginning:

Once his box was fully
engaged, Joey went wild …

and descending rapidly into Joey reciting the litany of queer sexual ecstasy. This year’s verse (below) is carnal but not deranged by desire.

Note 1. Yes, an underwear ad sans underwear. Roughly like some elements in certain syntactic constructions, the underwear is understood, or implicit.

Consider English examples like Give me all of your lupines! or Please fuck me! In comprehending such examples, we recognize (from the context they’re in) that their verbs are in an imperative construction, so we understand that the action of the verbs is to be performed by the addressee, even though the sentences have no grammatical subject for the verbs. (A 2nd-person subject is understood, or implicit.)

In roughly similar fashion, we look at #1 and recognize (from the context he’s in) that Joey is in an underwear ad, so we understand that underwear is part of Joey’s costume, even though he has nothing covering his crotch and buttocks. (Something like briefs or boxers or a thong or a jockstrap is understood, or implicit.)

We can even make a pretty good guess that, given the way his buttocks are focused on and given those stockings, the underwear that he’s not wearing is probably a red jockstrap that matches the stockings. (My conjecture is that he just never got around to putting any underwear on. Well, he is such an exhibitionist, that boy!)

Note 2. A piece of advice on the Usenet newsgroup soc.motss from Joseph Francis some years ago, directed at gay men: “Remember; you’re not just a man, you’re also a piece of meat.” That is, meat ‘a body … as an object of sexual pleasure’ (GDoS). So, as applied to men by gay men, meat can refer to the male body as whole (considered as pleasurable), taking in all of the bodily features that convey masculinity, including specifically male buttocks; or can focus on the primary foci of gay desire, the buttocks and the penis; or on the penis as the central focus (as in beat one’s meat ‘masturbate’).

If Joey is a piece of Christmas meat, what meat is he? Obviously something from the hindquarters of an animal: a rump roast of beef (which requires slow cooking to tenderize the relatively tough muscles) or a ham (pork — also from the hindquarters — that has been cured):

(#2) Primal cuts of pork (from which more specific cuts are carved), in the chart from the Spruce Eats site

Entertainingly, the Butcher Boy Market site has a seasonal piece on “The 5 Meats of Christmas” (sing: NOT “f-i-i-ve golden rings”, BUT “f-i-i-ve Christmas meats”): beef tenderloin, crown roast of pork, prime rib of beef, glazed roast of ham, rump roast of beef. (I’m sorry, but this list can be sung to the tune of “Carol of the Bells”. Please don’t hurt me.)

Joey’s free verse for 2021.


We are to understand that Joey is proposing a Christmas treat for his boyfriend (and top) Bobby. His original idea was to offer his boybox along with the other boxes, in one of the postures devoted to making such offers (in this case, an offer for a side-by-side, or lateral, fuck). Perhaps in a variant in which the bottom’s head is not turned away, but instead turned to exchange affectionate gazes with his lover, as in this wonderful photo from Steve Vaschon’s Rear View (2003) — a book of nudes celebrating the male posterior:

(#4) Vaschon doesn’t number his pages or identify his models, so all I can tell you is that it’s in the book

3 Responses to “The star boxboy”

  1. Bill Stewart Says:

    Love a perky bee-hind! Favorite fetish- socks and a jock, or just socks.

  2. arnold zwicky Says:

    So that was Day 1 of Commercial Christmas: callipygian Joey, with his star for the Christmas tree — representing a partridge in a pear tree. Disappointingly, Day 2 (representing two turtle doves) is an 8.5-inch lifelike uncut dildo with flexible foreskin (named Jake). But can Jake bill and coo? I think not.

  3. Robert Coren Says:

    I’m sorry, but this list can be sung to the tune of “Carol of the Bells”.

    Well, it can also be sung to (most of) “The Twelve Days of Christmas”, which suits the context. In either case, it’s the scansion that explains what was to me at first the inexplicable omission of rack of lamb among the Christmas meats.

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