This week’s stellar typo

(Passing references to various sexual practices, so you might want to use your judgment.)

Today’s mail labeled [SPAM:#####]:

(#1)

The ad copy is seriously non-native English, so liquid pears for liquid pearls is an unsurprising typo, though the image of a man ejaculating liquid pears — pear brandy (Poire William(s)), for instance), pear liqueur, or pear cider — has a certain kinky charm to it.

The text in the video is clean, idiomatic English, right down to liquid pearls ‘semen’.

Liquid pears. The only instances of “rope of liquid pears” that came up in a Google search were two links to the ad above. For “liquid pears” on its own, there’s quite a lot, including various alcoholic drinks, among them a pear brandy that’s both tasty and a visual treat:

(#2)

Ejaculate that smells and tastes of eau de vie de poire would be a pleasant surprise for a recipient, but ejaculating a whole pear, even a nicely ripe one, just sounds painful on both sides.

Liquid pearls. As a metaphorical phrase, this could go in several directions. For instance, there’s this, from the Ranger Ink website:

(#3)

Liquid Pearls™ are a versatile, dimensional pearlescent paint that dries permanent when used on paper and on fabric. Use the easy flow tip for precision application and to create pearly accents quickly and easily.

Hand-washable, the paints are ideal for fabric applications such as wearable art, quilting and home décor projects.

Then there’s liquid pearls ‘semen’, with drops of milky ejaculate likened to pearls. I don’t seem to have recorded this sexual usage before, but it seems to be fairly common, especially in porn. But also in ads for sexual supplements and the like, as in #1.

(Note: there’s a Page on this blog about postings on ejaculate, ejaculation, and sexual practices involving ejaculate — and terms for all of these.)

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