From the stage directions for two holiday musical productions

(This is only glancingly about language, it’s all about man-man sex, and it’s profoundly sacrilegious and extravagantly queer, so you might want to exercise your judgment.)

1. from Maranatha: Coming Home for Thanksgiving

Chorus: O come, O come, Emmanuel / O Master, shoot your load — in our mouths!
[Stroking his disciples’ heads, Lord Manny shoots first into one open mouth, then the other.]
Chorus: He has come, O ye faithful / Faggots in submission
[The disciples swoon in delight over this evidence of their Master’s potency.]

2. from Patapan Patapan: A Christmas Divertissement

Chorus: Willie, take your little drum
[Willie offers his tight boyhole to Peter.]
Chorus: Robin, take your flute and come!
[Robin shoots in Willie’s cum-hungry mouth.]
[In ecstasy at being spitroasted, Willie emits inarticulate noises of holiday joy.]


I warned you.

The background, from my 2/25/16 posting “A katakana para”:


Maranatha … is a two-word Aramaic formula occurring only once in the New Testament

… [choices in interpreting the formula:] … the command option (“Come, Lord!”) … or the preterite option (“Our Lord has come”)

Both options lend themselves temptingly to sacrilegiously sexual word play on the verb come, as do the hymn names “O Come, O Come, Emmanuel” and “O Come, All Ye Faithful” — a temptation I’ve given in to [above].


“Patapan” (or “Pat-a-pan”) is a French Christmas carol in Burgundian dialect, later adapted into English.

In English, the crucial first line goes:

Willie, take your little drum, Robin take your flute and come!

Oh my, plenty of sexual imagery here. The flute is widely recognized as a phallic symbol, and the drumstick — whether the musical drumstick, the chicken drumstick, or the Drumstick ice cream product — is one as well.

The phallic flute gives us the slang expressions  play the flute / skin flute / man-flute / one-holed flute / etc.‘fellate’. An entertaining example from Robert Reisner & Lorraine Wechsler’s Encyclopedia of Graffiti (1974): “I play the flute and swalow the music.”, meaning ‘I suck cock and swallow the cum’. (The spelling is in the original, which is, after all, a bathroom graffito.)

Meanwhile, the drum itself is a vaginal symbol (because it’s a cavity); so it’s also an anal symbol (as in the gay slang drum s.o.’s bum ‘use a drumstick on s.o.’s asshole, fuck s.o. in the ass’).

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