Men and their pickles

From a re-run of the Law & Order episode “Shangri-La” (2002), Assistant D.A. Jack McCoy (played by Sam Waterston) to Associate D.A. Serena Southerlyn (played by Elisabeth Röhm):

Never get Freudian with a man with a pickle.

(McCoy is of course eating a pickle during their office conversation.)

This is what I took down as the scene went by, and what many others report. But some have it as the weightier:

Never get Freudian with a man holding a pickle.

Either way, an entertaining and memorable quotation.

As phallic symbols, pickles are of course almost automatically risible. Some pickle play from “The Further Adventures of Nick Danger, Third Eye” (from Firesign Theatre’s How Can You Be in Two Places at Once When You’re Not Anywhere at All (1969)), appreciated on this blog here:

Rocky [Rococo]: That’s correct, now look inside, Mr. Danger. (paper rustle) What do you see?
Nick [Danger]: That’s easy. That’s a pickle.

Nick: Nancy! I slipped the ring into my nose and the receiver into my pocket and (quick walking) headed for the door quickly, but I’d forgotten the little man with the evil grin.
Rocky: Just a second, Danger! What about my pickle?

Rocky: Are you threatening me?! Why you stupid toad! I ought to beat your brain out!
Nancy [Farber]: No! Put down that pickle!

Catherwood [the butler]: Uh, let me, uh, hold that contract for you, Mr. Danger…
Nick: (paper yank) I’ll keep that contract, Catherwood! But you can take this pickle off of my hands.
Nancy: Oh no, I think you better hold onto that, Nick.

Catherwood: Yes. Mrs. Farber and I were sitting right here in the living room, engaged in a friendly round of spin the pickle… weren’t we, dear? Yes, with our good friend, Mr. Rococo.

“Put down that pickle!” is wonderful, and “hold onto that [pickle]” is good too. Other possibilities: “Hand me that/your pickle!” and “I love your pickle”.

Stroke one’s pickle ‘masturbate’ is all over the place.

One Response to “Men and their pickles”

  1. Robert Coren Says:

    What, no Mae West reference?

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