A while back, several friends were talking about veganism and its challenges. I wondered about substitutes for cheese, and my companions googled up a variety of these, most of which didn’t get very good reviews. But then there was the wonderfully named Teese.

Teese: the melting vegan cheese

From Chicago Vegan Foods:

Teese Vegan Cheese, a 100% dairy-free, gluten-free, soy-based alternative to dairy cheese, first launched in 2008. We created a product that tastes, melts, and stretches better than any other dairy-free cheese alternative on the market. Teese can be used just like regular dairy cheese in all of your favorite meals. Perfect for pizzas, mac ‘n’ cheese, grilled cheese, and nachos. (link)

(In passing, I note the retronym dairy cheese.)

As a line of (iambic) tetrameter, the Teese slogan cries out for expansion into a 4 x 4 (see here and here). A quick stab:

Teese, the melting vegan cheese
Will work on pizza, pasta too.
It melts and stretches like a breeze,
Near-mozarella just for you.


One Response to “Teese”

  1. larrysavage Says:

    Another portmanteau?? Teese – Tease + Cheese??

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