Annals of remarkable commerce

(About anatomical organs and sex between men, totally not suitable for kids or the sexually modest)

On the Naked Sword site yesterday (9/19), this remarkable ad for Fort Troff BOOF CBD suppositories (“It’s like poppers for your ass”):

The ad certainly made my morning yesterday; it’s so gee-whiz enthusiastic. “My hole has never felt so good” / “Made my ass so hungry”.

Back in a previous life, I was an enthusiast of anal pleasure, both with sex toys (though of quite modest size) and getting fucked (by cocks of many sorts), and I appreciate the importance of relaxing and opening your asshole if these practices are to be genuinely pleasurable. There are techniques for doing this, but they require some practice. (Or poppers, which famously relax the relevant muscles — but for various reasons poppers weren’t safe for me to use.) The idea that a CBD suppository in your asshole would do the trick, however,  is intriguing but also ridiculous.

But here’s the longer sales pitch from Fort Troff:

Take a chill pill. Or a FT BOOF CBD Suppository.

These butt shots deliver the awesome relaxation power of CBD so you can take bigger cocks and more.

We’ve teamed up with Foria, a company that is known as the BEST for potency and quality of CBD supplements. BOOF is a Premium Broad-Spectrum CBD Suppository, formulated for muscle relaxation, inflammation relief, and maximum pleasure. They harness the sensual power of hemp, which creates full-body relaxation and a clean, engaged mind. No, you won’t get fucked up or desensitized. There’s no THC. Your ass will simply feel really fuckin good.

Apparently, there’s very little that cannabidiol cannot do (Flanders & Swann: “Oh there’s nothing that a wompom cannot do”).

Now some background. First, a previous posting on this blog about the wonderful things CBD can do: from 2/9/18 in “Mary Jane comes to Palo Alto”, about two events at the Palo Alto Tacolicious restaurant featuring “crab plus CBD cocktails”, made with Sonoma Hills Farm fruit juices infused with cannabidiol (CBD) hemp oil; plus some background on CBD.

Then about Fort Troff. From the About section on the company page:

It all started with a sex party. A dark, warehouse-style sex party where anything could happen. To better serve the men who came back every month to play hard, our founder opened a shop inside selling the basics — quality cock rings, dildos, and lube. Today, our team still road-tests every single product, ensuring unparalleled quality and performance. We are 100% committed to you, our loyal customers, and have been since day one. Come play at the Fort.

The categories of their products: dongs, cock + ball, bondage, slings, gear, nip, electro, essentials (lubes, gloves, sheets, condoms).

And, finally, some words about CBD from a sober medical source, the Harvard Health Blog on the topic: from “Cannabidiol (CBD) — what we know and what we don’t” by Peter Grinspoon, MD on 8/24/18:

The evidence for cannabidiol health benefits

CBD has been touted for a wide variety of health issues, but the strongest scientific evidence is for its effectiveness in treating some of the cruelest childhood epilepsy syndromes, such as Dravet syndrome and Lennox-Gastaut syndrome (LGS), which typically don’t respond to antiseizure medications. In numerous studies, CBD was able to reduce the number of seizures, and in some cases it was able to stop them altogether. Videos of the effects of CBD on these children and their seizures are readily available on the Internet for viewing, and they are quite striking. Recently the FDA approved the first ever cannabis-derived medicine for these conditions, Epidiolex, which contains CBD.

CBD is commonly used to address anxiety, and for patients who suffer through the misery of insomnia, studies suggest that CBD may help with both falling asleep and staying asleep.

CBD may offer an option for treating different types of chronic pain. A study from the European Journal of Pain showed, using an animal model, CBD applied on the skin could help lower pain and inflammation due to arthritis. Another study demonstrated the mechanism by which CBD inhibits inflammatory and neuropathic pain, two of the most difficult types of chronic pain to treat. More study in humans is needed in this area to substantiate the claims of CBD proponents about pain control.

No mention, alas, of relaxing your asshole to accept large stiff objects for your sexual pleasure.

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