Double male proficiency

Pinterest regularly shows me boards on all sorts of interesting topics. Today’s find: “sleeve tattoos for guys”, with astonishing intricate tattoos covering much or all of an arm, or an arm with an extension on to a pec (suddenly sexy). Gorgeous patterns, many in color, most abstract, but some art work depicting scenes.

And sprinkled in amid this field of body images, lots of pin spam: sites offering stuff for sale, all kinds of stuff: wallets, watches, shirts, throw blankets, … and a collection of hoodies and tees from zapbest2.myshopify.com, including this double entendre number in red:

A double appeal to male proficiency: to skill as a fisherman (wielding his fishing rod to pull fish in), to skill as a dicksman (wielding his meatrod to satisfy his partner, bring his partner to climax).

(The items dicksman and meatrod are pretty much strictly “porn vocabulary”, inventive lexical material for ornamenting porn. Hard to imagine anyone actually saying things like “I’m crazy about Tony; he’s a fantastic dicksman, with a really big meatrod”.)

Rods, of course, are natural phallic symbols, as are lances and staffs, which gives the names Rod and Lance some snicker potential and makes Psalm 23 the source of sacrilegious crude humor, because of its line variously rendered in English as “Thy rod and thy staff, they comfort me”, “Your rod and your staff, they comfort me” (modernizing the pronouns), and “Your rod and your staff comfort me” (making it more formal, less colloquial). That gets us to what I’ve heard described as The Faggot’s Consolation: Thy rod and thy staff, they comfort me. In a proper-name variant,  Thy Rod and thy Lance, they comfort me.

[Added soon after: I discover that there is a gay porn video entitled “Desmond and the Dicksman”. Paired alliterating trochaic names: good sound. I get an echo of “Benny and the Jets”, but maybe there’s an even closer model.]

One Response to “Double male proficiency”

  1. Mike Says:

    I heard George W. described when, he was running for president if you can believe it, as a “cuntsman” during his young and wild days. But I don’t believe it was meant in flattering way.

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