Making assumptions

More variants of the “shaving cream” song, in which the listener’s assumptions about an upcoming rhyming word are frustrated; earlier discussion here.

Over on ADS-L, Victor Steinbok has now added this YouTube version of “The Assumption Song” (the ending is NSFW), and Wilson Gray has pointed out a (clean) song of  this type from the ’50’s, “Sweet Violets”, sung by Dinah Shore to the same tune:

Sweet violets
Sweeter than the roses
Covered all over from head to toe
Covered all over with sweet violets
There once was a farmer who took a young miss
In back of the barn to give her a lecture
On horses and cows and chickens and eggs
And told her that she had such beautiful
Manners that befitted a girl of her charms
A girl that he wanted to take in his
Washing and ironing and then if she did
They would get married and raise lots of
Sweet violets
Sweeter than the roses
Covered all over from head to toe
Covered all over with sweet violets
The girl told the farmer that he’d better stop
And she called her father and he called a
Taxi and got there, before very long
‘Cause someone was doin’ his sweet, little girl
Right for a change, and so that’s why he said
If you marry her, son, you’re better off single
‘Cause it’s always been my belief
Marriage will bring a man nothing but
Sweet violets
Sweeter than the roses
Covered all over from head to toe
Covered all over with sweet violets
The farmer decided he’d wed, anyway
And started in planning for his wedding
Suit, which he purchased for only one buck
But then he found out he was all out of
Money and so he got left in the lurch
A-standin’ and waitin’ in front of the
End of the story which just goes to show
All a girl wants from a man is his
Sweet violets
Sweeter than the roses
Covered all over from head to toe
Covered all over with sweet violets
Sweet violets

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