On AZBlogX, a piece on this topic, taking off on a new porn flick entitled Hoodies. Focusing on muscle impact play and (ritualized) abuse. You’ve been warned.
On AZBlogX, a piece on this topic, taking off on a new porn flick entitled Hoodies. Focusing on muscle impact play and (ritualized) abuse. You’ve been warned.
February 26, 2013 at 11:34 pm |
I take issue with your use of the word “abuse” in this context. One very significant difference between BDSM/kink/fetish play and genuine abuse is the presence or absence of consent. Much of what BDSM players engage in might well look like abuse to someone outside the community, but the hallmark of actual abuse is that the recipient has not consented to it and has no power to stop it. In a BDSM scene, what will happen has usually been negotiated in advance, including “safewords” that the bottom can use to call an immediate halt to the proceedings; a top who violates or ignores a safeword will quickly find him- or herself without any future play partners.
Using the word “abuse” in describing BDSM helps to perpetuate the myths that Dominants/tops/etc. are all thugs, that submissives/bottoms/etc. are all pathetic and lacking self-esteem, and that everyone involved in the scene is mentally ill and lacking the skills necessary to form a “real” relationship.
That BDSM and genuine abuse may sometimes incorporate the same accessories in no way means that they are the same. I’m surprised that a linguist would throw such a charged term around so carelessly.